Saturday, 3 October 2009

Dealing with grief.

I guess you will realise that i have not blogged in some time.

Well some may realise that my father had terminal cancer.

I was with him in his last 5 days of life helping with the personal care he needed.

It was not nice and i never let myself see him as a dying man.

I still took the mick out of him and still smacked his head.

The last 2 days of his life were the worst, i cannot believe that he was given 6 to 12 months and was gone in just over 4.

Myself, me mum, sisters, their partners, his gf, and other friends were there when he passed away.

It was the worst thing i had ever seen, i have seen other people die in the care jobs i have done.

But my own dad who i only just got to know was just awful.

My family have taken it hard.

I did cry then kept it all together during his funeral.

It was the most amazing funeral i had ever seen and a mass turnout, we did my dad proud.

A few days later we scattered his ashes in the river that he loved.

It was a lovely day.

Now is the time where i must try to move on from it as i want to get back to ome normality, but i get a lil sad and start to think about my dad when i should remember him in better times not the worst.

I think as i start making plans and try to enjoy life like my dad wanted me to, i will get there.

Any ideas on how maybe better to cope?